Everyday Life of a Dom Boyfriend

Translated by Neirith

Episode Eight – Everyone Passes By (3)

Ye Qia was hardly surprised that Xia Zhi had many ex-boyfriends.
After all, he had a very clear idea about Xia Zhi’s sex appeal.
Although he wasn’t eye-catching at first glance, he exuded a certain charisma.

Due to his violent tendencies, Xia Zhi was inclined to relegate himself to a lower position.
And after many years of suffering under family pressure as a debt collector, he didn’t tend to sweat the small stuff, that is, as long as he wasn’t provoked.
Thus, he was generally agreeable and pleasant to get along with.
Not to mention, he was very excitable and enthusiastic in bed. 

Indeed, Ye Qia had to admit that he was very satisfied in bed, and servicing Xia Zhi was quite pleasurable.
For gays, this was already very attractive.
Others described him as hot enough to burn, but when describing Xia Zhi, he was cool enough to kill.     

Except… Seventeen?! Are you kidding me?! Seventeen! Isn’t that too many?!

“Did you live together with all of them?”

“I didn’t with a few.” Xia Zhi started counting on his fingers.
“Maybe half of them.
There was one long-distance relationship, and one who wanted to be platonic, but dumped him.
Uhh, the rest were pretty normal.
I lived with nine of them, and the longest relationship lasted a year and a half.”

“Wait a minute.” Ye Qia finally discovered the main point.
“The longest was a year and a half?” 

Xia Zhi immediately displayed a look of embarrassment.
“The breakups were usually because they couldn’t withstand my violence, so they beat me up.
Then they’d break up with me.”

“…”

Ye Qia secretly sighed and gave a smile that wasn’t a smile.
“Apart from this, there were none others?”

“My ex hooked up with my other ex! When I got off work, I purposely called him, and when I got home, they were still in bed together!” As he said this, Xia Zhi became enraged, snarling with his fists clenched.
“They even asked if I wanted a threesome! What the fuck, if I wanted a threesome, I wouldn’t look for them! One had a tiny dick and one had athlete’s foot!”

Hurriedly pulling the infuriated Xia Zhi into his embrace, Ye Qia held his spiky head and sang with an operatic voice, “Oh, little young lady, cry your heart out in my arms…”

Xia Zhi immediately cooled off and rolled his eyes, appearing to have brightened up as he foisted an elbow at Ye Qia.
He sighed gloomily, “I’m telling you, I don’t know why, but I treat them well every time.
After a while, I started to think it was an issue of domestic violence.
But there were a few that I didn’t lay hands on and after a while, those sons of bitches either cheated then dumped me, or dumped me then cheated.
Tell me, do I have the three words ‘cheat on me’ written on my face?” He said, disappointed, “Is it so hard to part amicably? I never got the chance to break up, it was always me coming home to find them…”

Ye Qia thought it was really funny, but he didn’t say anything and just changed the subject.
As the two of them conversed, they entered a period of raging fires and stiff wood.
When he entered Xia Zhi, he heard a low groan.
“Fuck, let’s make an appointment soon.
This condom doesn’t feel good.”

“Does it hurt?”

“That’s not it…” Xia Zhi wrinkled his brows and shifted his ass, clamping his legs around Ye Qia’s waist.
“Maybe I overreacted.”

“Oh, I bought the ribbed kind.”

“… What the fuck, Ye Qia, you, ah! Ooh, ah!”

Once they finished, Ye Qia pulled out his tablet.
Xia Zhi also didn’t bathe and immediately wriggled into Ye Qia’s covers.
Nowadays, he had already developed a habit of grabbing his entire leg when he slept, plastering his face on the side of his butt, with his hands wrapped around the base of his thigh as if he were holding a giant carrot.

Watching Xia Zhi act this way, Ye Qia appeared to ask casually, “Do you still have the contact info for your ex-boyfriends?”

“Yeah.” Xia Zhi said sleepily as he lay there, his hands involuntarily caressing Ye Qia’s thigh.
“I’ve never changed my number.
It’s all saved.”

“Hmm, good.” Ye Qia gazed at the tablet and said slowly, “Very good.”

Early next morning, before Xia Zhi woke, Ye Qia copied all of the numbers and waited for Xia Zhi to go to work.
Afterwards, he called Gourmand.
“Help me investigate some people.”

“Who?”

“Some don’t have names.”

In Xia Zhi’s phone, there was a special group named “ex-boyfriends.” Among those, were names such as “Second Reign,” “1998,” “Big Ass,” and so on and so forth. 

“How many people?”

“Seventeen.”    

Gourmand didn’t reply for a while.
“What are you doing?”

“I don’t want to tell you.”

“It’s not like you can’t tell me.”

This time, it was Ye Qia’s turn to stay silent.
He thought for a bit, and then said, “Xia Zhi’s ex-boyfriends.”

Gourmand made a sound of exclamation.
“So many?”

“Yes.”

After laughing for a while, Gourmand said, “Alright, wait for my word.”

Once he hung up, Ye Qia got up and prepared for work as usual.
While he was shaving, he peered at himself in the mirror.
Despite being older than Xia Zhi, he looked younger than him due to proper maintenance.
He looked noble and wealthy, and could retire at any time to live a life of leisure ——granted, he needed to move somewhere where nobody recognized him—— but in spite of this, he still felt uneasy.

Sighing, he decided that tonight, he’d bring back a new sex toy.
He didn’t have the energy to do it every day, his waist would snap.

As Xia Zhi was living a carefree life, holding a bowl of rice while watching a comedy skit and spurting rice all over as he laughed heartily, Ye Qia was sitting on the side, feeling like an idiot.
However, when Gourmand’s message arrived with a list of names, he immediately became resolute and determined, intent on proceeding with his plan.

“Hello, I’m Xia Zhi’s friend…”

“Xia Zhi told me to call you?”

“No, some of our friends want to throw him a surprise birthday party, so we went through his phone to find people…”

“He still has my number saved?”

“… Yes.”

“That’s really great, I’m coming! I’m definitely coming! Tell me the time and place!”

“Uhh, is there something wrong? Why are you so excited?”

“No, no, sorry, I’m his… good friend.
I really miss him.
Anyways, tell me the time and place!”

Upon hanging up, Ye Qia touched his face, feeling drained.
After a few minutes, he revitalized his spirits and went on to the next one, deciding to change his tactics. 

“Hi, I’m Xia Zhi’s boyfriend, I…”

“Fuck, Xia Zhi has a boyfriend? Since when?”

“He…”

“You tell him, I don’t care.
I didn’t agree to break up!”

“…”

After hanging up, Ye Qia doubted his life for a few moments.
Then, he mustered up the courage to continue. 

“Hello, I’m Xia Zhi’s colleague.”

“May I ask what the problem is?”

This one sounded more normal, Ye Qia thought to himself.
Relieved, he said, “We’re planning a surprise birthday party for him, so I’m going through his contacts to call people.”

“Really? May I ask which group I’m sorted in under?”

“Friends.”

“Oh.” There was a short period of silence from the other line.
“Please inform me of the time and location, I will definitely come.”

Out of the seventeen people, five had boyfriends, three were married to women, and two had changed their numbers.
The remainder had promptly agreed to come, including four of the “taken” ones.
This, Ye Qia confirmed through the circle of ex-boyfriends. 

The most important thing was that everyone was very excited for this. 

Ye Qia grabbed the phone and held it foolishly for a while before calling Magician and said as soon as it connected, “Is there any kind of medicine that can cause lifetime erectile dysfunction once it’s mixed with alcohol?”

“What are you up to?”

“Cleaning up.”

Magician cackled, “Why do you need this kind of medication?”

“Because Xia Zhi won’t get together with someone who can’t fuck him.”

Magician laughed even harder, “Unfortunately, there is not.”

“Well then, prepare for me, thirteen pills that can’t be found on autopsy.”

“Hey, stop it!”

Ye Qia looked out the sun shining through the window and said lazily, “What if I can’t?”

He suddenly recalled something.
What was it that precipitated all of this discussion about ex-boyfriends? Oh, right, Sheng Le saw Ge Yue… Ge Yue…Who was he again?

—–

Neirith: In which Ye Qia casually contemplates murder.